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In my early years as a Christian, I would have used Philippians to make a case that being a Christian was about working hard to become perfect – that’s why my senior quote was, “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have yet been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ took hold of me.” (Really!:) It was my way of saying to the classmates and teachers who thought I was ‘perfect’! (yeah, I really believed this!:), “No, I’m not, but I’ll get there!”

IS IT ANY WONDER THAT I FELL HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH THE GOSPEL WHEN I TRULY BEGAN TO UNDERSTAND IT?!!!

This morning, in my continued study of Philippians, I read the verses I would have misused so many years ago and in them discovered the good news of God’s grace. Read them and then listen to what brilliant theologian Alec Motyer has to say:

Phil. 2:12-18

Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.
Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing. But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.

Alec Motyer’s commentary:
“But there is more to verses 12-16a than a list of commands; it is also a list of reassurances. There is a balance created between what we are to do and to strive to be and, on the other hand, what is already true of us. By statement or implication the directives are ‘Obey’, ‘Work’ (verse 12), ‘Do’ (verse 14), ‘Be blameless’, etc., ‘Shine’ (verse 15) and ‘Hold fast’ (verse 16). The reassurances are ‘God is at work’ (verse 13), ‘You are God’s children’, ‘You are lights’ (verse 15). This is the balance and testimony of the verses: the Christian life, growing in the likeness of Christ, is a blend of rest and activity – not alternating from one to the other, but a blend in which, at one and the same moment, the Christian is both resting confidently (for example, on what God is doing within) and actively pursuing (for example, the duty of being blameless). 126

Your own salvation is to be understood, not as an objective yet to be reached, certainly not as a benefit to be merited, but as a possession to be explored and enjoyed more fully.”

On verse 13:
“The note of effectiveness is sounded by the verb which Paul uses (energeo) and which characteristically describes work which achieves its purpose; the outcome is guaranteed in the deed. The verb is defined later in this same letter (3:21) when, using the related noun, Paul speaks of the ‘effective working’ (RSV ‘power’) by which he is able to subordinate all things to himself. God’s working is effectual working;  he cannot be deflected from his course nor fail to achieve his purpose. With our daily catalogue of failure and our not infrequent despair of ourselves, what unspeakable comfort lies in this truth!”

I’ve been studying Philippians lately, which leads quickly into the topic of servanthood as we move into that incredible Chapter 2…The last few days I’ve been meditating on servanthood, and asking God to make me more like His servant Jesus.  Sometimes it seems He answers these prayers by showing me how UNLIKE His Servant I am.  An event yesterday served up another such moment, leaving me marveling at His grace:

Isaiah 42 from The Message
God’s Servant Will Set Everything Right
1-4 “Take a good look at my servant.
I’m backing him to the hilt.
He’s the one I chose,
and I couldn’t be more pleased with him.
I’ve bathed him with my Spirit, my life.
He’ll set everything right among the nations.
He won’t call attention to what he does
with loud speeches or gaudy parades.
He won’t brush aside the bruised and the hurt
and he won’t disregard the small and insignificant,
but he’ll steadily and firmly set things right.
He won’t tire out and quit. He won’t be stopped
until he’s finished his work—to set things right on earth.
Far-flung ocean islands
wait expectantly for his teaching.”

Eugene Peterson writes this about it:
“Isaiah 42:1-9 is the first of our four Servant songs (see also 49:1-7; 50:4-9; and 52:13-53:12). The essential thing communicated here is that God is with this Servant. The Servant receives divine upholding. He is the divine choice, he is the object of divine delight, he is animated by the divine Spirit, and his work is the divine work of bringing justice to the entire world.
The picture is of a true Servant. He doesn’t bully; he befriends. He doesn’t shout; he speaks softly. There’s no hard sell with those who dismiss him and no harsh argument with those who deny him. He won’t brush aside a person who is bruised and hurt, nor will he disregard the small and insignificant. There’s no element of coercion in his approach. Only compassion.”

I read this after a low-volume shouting match w/ our almost 16-yr. old. It wasn’t meant to go like this. It began w/ me shouting my happiness for her aloud when she told me she won V.P. for SGA next year. And then she asked me to tell her again when her brother’s 8th grade banquet was. To my response, she said, ‘You’re gonna kill me…’ It turns out her SGA banquet is the same night.

The thing is, I had planned for this, I had emailed my family, asking them to put the May events on their calendars and RSVP. (This is how I handle being the mother of four teenagers in May, two of whom are graduating .)  And so smoke started coming out of my ears. Not because I was really mad at her, mostly because I was disappointed for our youngest, who would want her there. My husband is accompanying our graduating senior to a Sports Association awards banquet that night, so there are already two missing.

And do you see how I am trying to justify what I did? There is no excuse.  I was most of the things Eugene Peterson describes in the second paragraph. The only serving I did was to my self-laid plans. I bullied, I shouted, I argued and I brushed aside. I had no compassion. And when it was all over, I was furious at myself for ranting about it. “When will I shut my angry mouth and weep the tears of disappointment,” I asked the Lord.
And He showed me this passage and these words and reminded me, “I see you in my Servant.” All of it. He is with me. He upholds me. He chose me, and I am His delight. I am animated by the Spirit, and through this power, I can bring justice to the world. Not as Christ does, not yet, but He still sees me in that righteousness.

I went to my daughter and explained that I am a moron.  She graciously forgave me and welcomed me back to relationship, and we went to get ice cream to celebrate her victory.  

And I am left lingering at the wonder of the gospel paradox. I am a poor Servant Queen, and God humbles me and honors me.